“B.M.” writes:
I have a practice about pooping. I don’t go until it’s ready to glide right out. It’s really pleasurable to not have to work hard. I’ve never been constipated. I think it’s mind-control. I can move my bowels by thinking about it. It’s some kind of Jedi mind trick, because you think to yourself, I’m going to have an excellent shit. You go and sit on the toilet, and then it’s immediate, it’s clean and it’s satisfying. It’s efficient. I like to have my body functioning at maximum efficiency.
It’s not an issue of urgency, and not that I want to avoid the bathroom. I enjoy reading on the toilet as much as anyone else. Actually there are times when I sit down and think, okay, I’m going to read something to pass the time while I’m here, but before I even get the book open I’m done and then I think, well that’s silly, or sometimes I just sit there and read anyway. I never shit after I’ve opened a book; it just never happens that way. I like that it doesn’t involve muscular straining, it’s all in my head: when I wanna go, my brain calmly and rationally tells my gut that it’s time.
I don’t know if it’s relevant, but the first time I ever shit on the big girl pot was because my mom bribed me with a single m&m.
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